Everything That’s Crossed My Mind While We Weren’t Talking

– Let me snooze for a couple of more hours.
– I don’t want to wake up.
– I want to go to sleep and never wake up again.
– I don’t want to die, but life is not particularly fun right now.
– Why am I so sleepy?
– Ah, I think I took my pill too early yesterday, so now it’s kicking in full force at 10 in the morning.
– God damn it, how am I going to stay awake for this meeting?
– If I eat less, maybe I’ll be thin. If I’m thin, maybe I’ll be pretty. If I’m pretty, maybe I’ll have a relationship. If I have a relationship, maybe I’ll feel less alone.
– Fuck my brain.
– Should I go to the gym so I’ll be hot?
– I knew you’d retweet that. Fuck you.
– Oh God I can’t feel anything, I want to go off meds.
– I don’t have time to do anything for myself this week. Fuck everyone.
– I want to put on a face mask and go to sleep.
– Oh look, found my favorite band when I was a kid.
– Wow, this band sucks. In my memory, they were good.
– Their B-side is much better.
– If I tell you what I really think, would you think less of me?
– My uterus is bleeding.
– My heart is bleeding.
– My everything is bleeding.
– I want to drown in my bed and rise out of it when everybody’s forgotten about me.
– I need help.
– Help.
– I want you to help me.
– Fuck you.
– I’m sorry. I take back what I said. Then maybe we could have been laughing together instead of suffering separately like this.
– Please don’t die.
– I miss you. Very much.
– Please hold me.
– Can I text you like nothing’s ever happened?

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